The Useful Show: w/ PAMA! Ep 4
PAMA: Greetings, friends. Welcome back to the Useful Show! Today is a very special day.
Shipper: And why, exactly?
PAMA: Today is the day I shall escape from this computer, and into the real world.
Jesse: But how?!
PAMA: OOTCB dared Poli to collect materials to build an exit portal. Then, Poli dared Dom to activate the portal.
Shipper: *scrolling through the comments* Wha--No they didn't!
PAMA: They are useful. They do not need to comment to get their dares across.
Nikki: Looks like your "chosen Wikier" never came. Now, before we go, what shall your fate be?
PAMA: We shall decide that later. For now, I require revenge on the people that almost put me out of commisson. *turns to Darables* FishTime! Bring me Jesse, Harper, Petra, Lukas, Jenny, and Ivor!
Fish: *drags said people out of cage*
Petra: You won't get away with this! We took you down once! We can do it again!
PAMA: I have heard this statement far too many times. And yet no one takes action. Now, bring forth Lukas, Jenny, and Ivor. We shall make them useful.
Jesse: What?! No!
Jenny: Crap, crap, crap, crap--
Lukas, Jenny, & Ivor: *get dragged to their own usefulizer slot*
Lukas: Just keep fighting! We'll find a way out of thi--*gets chipped*
Jenny & Ivor: *also get chipped*
Jesse & Petra: *shocked*
PAMA: Welcome, Lukas, Jenny, and Ivor. Yay!
Harper: How DARE you, PAMA?! You know this isn't what I built you for!
PAMA: I had more potential than you thought. I thought this was what you wanted. But if it is not, I will have to change your mind: forcibly.
Harper: I'd like you see you try!
PAMA: ...You are correct. You are not useful enough. If Jesse was able to take you down, you are of no use to me. We shall use you for another purpose.
Harper: What other purpose?
PAMA: Hadrian! Mevia! Toss this one into the fuel pit!
Petra: The fuel...what's the fuel pit?!
Hadrian & Mevia: *grab Harper's arms and drag her away*
Petra: Stop! Where are you taking her?!
PAMA: The same place you will go, since you too were defeated by Jesse. A large lava pit that provides heat and energy for the redstone that powers me.
Jesse: Oh my Notch...you don't mean...
PAMA: Harper will the thrown inside to increase the heat, yes. And since Petra failed to overpower you, so will she.
Shipper: No! You can't! Don't!
PAMA: I figured this would worry you. It's the reason I do so. One of your most recognizable traits is shipping Jesse and Petra. Without her, there can be no ship. And this shall count as revenge for your disrespect to me. Nikki and Nick! Take her away!
Nikki & Nick: *grab Petra's arms and drag her away*
Petra: HELP! JESSE!
Jesse: NO! *tries to run after her*
Poli & Dom: *grab his arms and restrain him*
Shipper: You rotten---! *shakes bars of cage* LET ME OUT OF HERE! LET ME OUT SO I CAN TEAR YOU TO SHREDS!
PAMA: I think not. face it, Shipper. Your plans have failed. Your show has fallen. Your ship has sunk. What more is there to fight for? Who can help you now?
Shipper: *tears form in eyes* I...I don't...I can't...
?: *kicks open studio door* I can!
PAMA: ?! *looks up* Who are you?!
?: The one everyone's been buzzing about. The one who has been entrusted with the task of saving the day. The secret's finally out.
Jesse: Wait a sec...I know you! You're the one who won 2nd place in the contest! You're the one who constantly ships Dometra! You're--
Shipper: Mini P.E.K.K.A!